So interesting to read these negative reviews - especially because I reeeeeally wanted to dislike All Fours. MJ has always rubbed me the wrong way and if I’m being real, there’s a part of me that’s always trying to resist the things other people love. 🙄 But I did read it anyway, and this book was so moving, so vital, so vicious in its alignment with my internal life, I loved it more than anything, despite myself. I’ve wanted to re-read it actually but find myself avoiding because it feels almost overwhelming to think about being that impacted again.
Thanks for sharing, Bridget! I love that the book had this effect on (some) people. I mean, how many books achieve this?? "this book was so moving, so vital, so vicious in its alignment with my internal life, I loved it more than anything, despite myself. "
So well said and idk, as much as some women hated it, it was just transformative for other women, and I love that for them. Women's inner lives are so seldom taken seriously anywhere, including literature.
All Fours was a miserable read about a boring narcissist. The parts of the novel that were innovative and charming (the cool hotel room, the interesting kid) were completely submerged under the weight of the main character's dull self-obsession and poor people skills. I literally loathed the main character and hoped she would have SOME kind of awakening about what a miserable person she was, but nope, she remained stuck in 12-year old navel-gazing. Ugh!
This is so funny bc I literally just wrote about how boring “vulnerable narcissist” characters are in re: to the Bear. And now I have to rethink this in re: to All Fours 😅
I didn't finish it because I HATED it. No shade on anyone who liked it, but I couldn't relate in any way to the main character (which btw is not usually a reason I dislike a book - I've read hundreds of books about characters totally unlike me). I wasn't drawn in by the plot at all (or at least not enough to care what happened at the end). Her obsession with Davey was just boring to me. Snooze fest. All of it. Glad I bought it and started it to see what the fuss was about, but not sorry I didn't finish.
Hahaha I''m SO glad that you chimed in, Leslie! You are one of the people I thought of when I wrote this post. Bc you're someone who I know is really well-read, and also that you hated this book.
It's SO interesting to me that people--esp women--who align on a lot of things have WILDLY different reactions to it. There's just something about it I can't put my finger on.
We all contain multitudes. I can relate to women who liked the book because it gave a voice to midlife women who feel voiceless/invisible (or, I guess, one midlife woman who has a LOT of free time and money to throw around). I guess maybe that is the crux of my issue: The author gave a midlife woman a voice and that woman didn't have much to say except that she's extremely horny. She definitely gave readers something to talk about though. ;)
This just reminded me of something interesting that Sarah Jessica Parker said when she was recently on Las Culturistas podcast. I had heard this before, but maybe it didn't sink in until now. She was talking about how Sex and the City was different because Carrie, Miranda Charlotte, and Samantha were dating and having sex like men — just for the fun of it and not for any "higher purpose," like forming a union or a family. In a way, I think Miranda July was doing that, too, in this book, letting her protagonist do whatever the F she wanted, like a single dude. but I guess then it makes me realize that this woman is still actualized in relation to a man, which I guess reflects the reality of our society, but doesn't seem to offer any real liberation for the main character. And that's OK. Art is still art even when it's not everyone's cup of tea.
I def read the book as a female author creating a female character taking the same liberties that a privileged male character often does--and just letting that play out with no reservations or shame. It's not relatable that the main character has so much privilege, but it's like--what would happen if we had a female character who was semi-famous and successful the wya that many male characters are, and what choices might she make? I liked that thought experiment and the way it seems to snub any sort of gender essentialism.
A good friend of mine who is in publishing thinks the book is meant to be read as a satire, and I've heard that from a couple people. I don't see it quite that way, but I can see how it could work.
I thought the writing in this book was outstanding. Interestingly I did not find the voice of the main character to be off-putting, but I know that some others did. Maybe that’s bc I’m male and that kind of attention to interiority and the main character’s own desires felt normal to me. I’m not sure what that says about me or the writer.
I should also give the caveat that I didn’t read it ll the way through, but not out of disinterest, just time.
I also fell in love with the writing immediately. And I feel like that is some kind of Rorscharch test, but I don't know what it means. I know so many people who are really well-read and have a lot of common interest/feminist views, and just did NOT vibe with it. And then there are a bunch who loooooved it and bought thier "All Fours group chat" hats and wore them proudly.
idk what it means, but there's definitely a cultural dichotomy going on of some sort.
It's interesting - reading a description of the novel, I would think I would dislike it, but I've loved July's writing since her stories in the New Yorker a long time ago. Everyone should read Roy Spivey! I think she's just a genius stylist but she's always had such a unique way of writing - her characters so vulnerable, so sensitively attuned, so far from "discourse" - so I liked the book, but less than her other writing and I have an obnoxious indy-band "the earlier, less popular stuff was better!" reaction to the success of All Fours. I think it gets pegged as a "midlife crisis" novel when that's kind of the McGuffin and it's something much weirder . .. So it may be a cultural vibe thing and it may be a style thing - she has a very particular thing you vibe with or not . ..
And see this is what I just love about discussing this book. People have such insightful and interesting things to say about it. Thanks for sharing this. I loved this: "I think she's just a genius stylist but she's always had such a unique way of writing - her characters so vulnerable, so sensitively attuned, so far from "discourse"...I think it gets pegged as a "midlife crisis" novel when that's kind of the McGuffin and it's something much weirder . .."
I have never read Roy Spivey and hate to say I had never read/watched any of her work before AF! Given how much I liked the writing in this, I should check out Roy Spivey right away...
Oh you are in for a treat. I think her best are all the stories in her first collection, No One Belongs here more than You. Roy Spivey is my favorite of her stories and I think it's not in any of her books; https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2007/06/11/roy-spivey. I have more mixed feelings about her movies but they are definitely worth watching.
I hit a paywall but I'll get the rest of the story through my uni access...but I have to say I liked the first few sentences that I could see already! And also, it sounded like a familiar voice. Agree, I think either her style works for you or it doesn't...and I always feel like there's a v intelligent and wry mind at work in the voice.
I tried one of her movies--the cat one? Def not for me. But the writing, yes :)
I loved it! And I found the main character to be very funny and witty and relatable in a way I wasn't expecting because July's previous work had always been kind of cool but "out there" to me personally. The book was such a wild ride and I didn't find her narcissistic, we're literally in her brain and inner life, so of course it's going to be pretty self-centered. I found it be kind of the perfect mix of fantastical (the whole room redecorating thing) and grounded in real life and navigating being a human in the world.
I really related to her obsession with needing to be desired. I have been evaluating for years in therapy ! I feel like I’m just so conditioned to put all my value into my desirability. In recent years I’ve stopped coloring my hair because I’m so mad about how this anti aging message is woven into every dollar I’m supposed to spend. Yet, I related to the push-pull attraction to a younger man here so much too, and wondered if I could pull off the same? Does that sound terrible?
There was just so much here that I related to--the aging, desirability and wrestling with it, being a mom and needing a freaking space to YOURSELF for one hot minute. And it felt like it was all taken seriously for once in this book, and given some attention.
I just remembered all those interviews that she did with women to try to pin down something about relationships and desire, and I think you're right that this is a lot of what resonates in the book. As far as age gap relationships go--I have been in one for years and ofc think there's no shame whatsoever :)
So interesting to read these negative reviews - especially because I reeeeeally wanted to dislike All Fours. MJ has always rubbed me the wrong way and if I’m being real, there’s a part of me that’s always trying to resist the things other people love. 🙄 But I did read it anyway, and this book was so moving, so vital, so vicious in its alignment with my internal life, I loved it more than anything, despite myself. I’ve wanted to re-read it actually but find myself avoiding because it feels almost overwhelming to think about being that impacted again.
Thanks for sharing, Bridget! I love that the book had this effect on (some) people. I mean, how many books achieve this?? "this book was so moving, so vital, so vicious in its alignment with my internal life, I loved it more than anything, despite myself. "
So well said and idk, as much as some women hated it, it was just transformative for other women, and I love that for them. Women's inner lives are so seldom taken seriously anywhere, including literature.
All Fours was a miserable read about a boring narcissist. The parts of the novel that were innovative and charming (the cool hotel room, the interesting kid) were completely submerged under the weight of the main character's dull self-obsession and poor people skills. I literally loathed the main character and hoped she would have SOME kind of awakening about what a miserable person she was, but nope, she remained stuck in 12-year old navel-gazing. Ugh!
This is so funny bc I literally just wrote about how boring “vulnerable narcissist” characters are in re: to the Bear. And now I have to rethink this in re: to All Fours 😅
https://open.substack.com/pub/matriarchyreport/p/watching-the-bear-reminds-me-of-why?r=ywbs&utm_medium=ios
I didn't finish it because I HATED it. No shade on anyone who liked it, but I couldn't relate in any way to the main character (which btw is not usually a reason I dislike a book - I've read hundreds of books about characters totally unlike me). I wasn't drawn in by the plot at all (or at least not enough to care what happened at the end). Her obsession with Davey was just boring to me. Snooze fest. All of it. Glad I bought it and started it to see what the fuss was about, but not sorry I didn't finish.
I felt the exact same way. I did not finish it either. It was boring and I was annoyed every time I picked it up to try to get through it.
Hahaha I''m SO glad that you chimed in, Leslie! You are one of the people I thought of when I wrote this post. Bc you're someone who I know is really well-read, and also that you hated this book.
It's SO interesting to me that people--esp women--who align on a lot of things have WILDLY different reactions to it. There's just something about it I can't put my finger on.
We all contain multitudes. I can relate to women who liked the book because it gave a voice to midlife women who feel voiceless/invisible (or, I guess, one midlife woman who has a LOT of free time and money to throw around). I guess maybe that is the crux of my issue: The author gave a midlife woman a voice and that woman didn't have much to say except that she's extremely horny. She definitely gave readers something to talk about though. ;)
This just reminded me of something interesting that Sarah Jessica Parker said when she was recently on Las Culturistas podcast. I had heard this before, but maybe it didn't sink in until now. She was talking about how Sex and the City was different because Carrie, Miranda Charlotte, and Samantha were dating and having sex like men — just for the fun of it and not for any "higher purpose," like forming a union or a family. In a way, I think Miranda July was doing that, too, in this book, letting her protagonist do whatever the F she wanted, like a single dude. but I guess then it makes me realize that this woman is still actualized in relation to a man, which I guess reflects the reality of our society, but doesn't seem to offer any real liberation for the main character. And that's OK. Art is still art even when it's not everyone's cup of tea.
I def read the book as a female author creating a female character taking the same liberties that a privileged male character often does--and just letting that play out with no reservations or shame. It's not relatable that the main character has so much privilege, but it's like--what would happen if we had a female character who was semi-famous and successful the wya that many male characters are, and what choices might she make? I liked that thought experiment and the way it seems to snub any sort of gender essentialism.
A good friend of mine who is in publishing thinks the book is meant to be read as a satire, and I've heard that from a couple people. I don't see it quite that way, but I can see how it could work.
I thought the writing in this book was outstanding. Interestingly I did not find the voice of the main character to be off-putting, but I know that some others did. Maybe that’s bc I’m male and that kind of attention to interiority and the main character’s own desires felt normal to me. I’m not sure what that says about me or the writer.
I should also give the caveat that I didn’t read it ll the way through, but not out of disinterest, just time.
I also fell in love with the writing immediately. And I feel like that is some kind of Rorscharch test, but I don't know what it means. I know so many people who are really well-read and have a lot of common interest/feminist views, and just did NOT vibe with it. And then there are a bunch who loooooved it and bought thier "All Fours group chat" hats and wore them proudly.
idk what it means, but there's definitely a cultural dichotomy going on of some sort.
It's interesting - reading a description of the novel, I would think I would dislike it, but I've loved July's writing since her stories in the New Yorker a long time ago. Everyone should read Roy Spivey! I think she's just a genius stylist but she's always had such a unique way of writing - her characters so vulnerable, so sensitively attuned, so far from "discourse" - so I liked the book, but less than her other writing and I have an obnoxious indy-band "the earlier, less popular stuff was better!" reaction to the success of All Fours. I think it gets pegged as a "midlife crisis" novel when that's kind of the McGuffin and it's something much weirder . .. So it may be a cultural vibe thing and it may be a style thing - she has a very particular thing you vibe with or not . ..
And see this is what I just love about discussing this book. People have such insightful and interesting things to say about it. Thanks for sharing this. I loved this: "I think she's just a genius stylist but she's always had such a unique way of writing - her characters so vulnerable, so sensitively attuned, so far from "discourse"...I think it gets pegged as a "midlife crisis" novel when that's kind of the McGuffin and it's something much weirder . .."
I have never read Roy Spivey and hate to say I had never read/watched any of her work before AF! Given how much I liked the writing in this, I should check out Roy Spivey right away...
Oh you are in for a treat. I think her best are all the stories in her first collection, No One Belongs here more than You. Roy Spivey is my favorite of her stories and I think it's not in any of her books; https://www.newyorker.com/magazine/2007/06/11/roy-spivey. I have more mixed feelings about her movies but they are definitely worth watching.
I hit a paywall but I'll get the rest of the story through my uni access...but I have to say I liked the first few sentences that I could see already! And also, it sounded like a familiar voice. Agree, I think either her style works for you or it doesn't...and I always feel like there's a v intelligent and wry mind at work in the voice.
I tried one of her movies--the cat one? Def not for me. But the writing, yes :)
I loved it! And I found the main character to be very funny and witty and relatable in a way I wasn't expecting because July's previous work had always been kind of cool but "out there" to me personally. The book was such a wild ride and I didn't find her narcissistic, we're literally in her brain and inner life, so of course it's going to be pretty self-centered. I found it be kind of the perfect mix of fantastical (the whole room redecorating thing) and grounded in real life and navigating being a human in the world.
Unpopular opinion maybe...but I loved it.
I really related to her obsession with needing to be desired. I have been evaluating for years in therapy ! I feel like I’m just so conditioned to put all my value into my desirability. In recent years I’ve stopped coloring my hair because I’m so mad about how this anti aging message is woven into every dollar I’m supposed to spend. Yet, I related to the push-pull attraction to a younger man here so much too, and wondered if I could pull off the same? Does that sound terrible?
There was just so much here that I related to--the aging, desirability and wrestling with it, being a mom and needing a freaking space to YOURSELF for one hot minute. And it felt like it was all taken seriously for once in this book, and given some attention.
I just remembered all those interviews that she did with women to try to pin down something about relationships and desire, and I think you're right that this is a lot of what resonates in the book. As far as age gap relationships go--I have been in one for years and ofc think there's no shame whatsoever :)