11 Comments
author

I love your question about when I really understood benevolent patriarchy -- I have so many memories of male bosses who would be supportive of me professionally while also frequently comparing me to their daughters. So the message was clear: I would always be a dependent subordinate.

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Yes. It is really creepy! And so, so many are taught, and taught, and taught again, and again, to switch off their inbuilt creepy detectors from such a young age and beyond.

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author

Yes--such a good point. Taught to betray ourselves in that way, too!

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Oct 8Liked by Lane Anderson

Yup, as a former Evangelical, this is all very familiar to me. l grew up under the "Umbrella of Protection," which is this same creepy idea. I've written about this in my own Substack, a serialized memoir titled "State of Wonder."

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author

I have only heard of the “umbrella” recently! Different metaphor same patriarchy 🤷‍♀️

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Yes. This.

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author

Right?! TY!

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They are benevolent - until you think your own thoughts and disagree with them. Punishment is swift.

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Yeah, a rapist and serial groper on the top of the ticket and a guy who thinks other guys should have the right to beat their wives for the sake of the children without recourse against him. For the sake of the children... I'd laugh but there's nothing funny about being beaten up whenever hubby needs a target for his fury. These are the guys who say they'll protect women. Uh huh. Opt out by voting straight ticket Blue.

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Indeed, "benevolent" sexism is simply the velvet glove to hostile sexism's iron fist. Two sides, same coin. It's all one big protection RACKET and pyramid scheme.

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